what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize