Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
My penis needs a shock collar
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Randomize
