you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
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