Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
