worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
