guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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