it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
