What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize
