So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
bring money and cleavage
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I am naked and annoyed.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
