She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
