do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
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I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
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You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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