he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?