I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
