I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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