SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
vagina is talking i cant
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
