ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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