Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I smell stomach acid.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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