I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
