I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize