I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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