Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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