what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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