my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
