Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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