YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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