Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
