Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Randomize
