just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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