butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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