this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
