If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize