he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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