His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
ttyl tear gas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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