if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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