My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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