I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize