u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
