Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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