she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
