but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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