What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
