He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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