smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
