Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize