This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She swung at the pinata with crutches
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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