This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
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