And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
