I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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