Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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