She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
soo... how was my night?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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