It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
