he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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